Illini, Tigers, and Bears, Oh My! The Almost Lost Weekend

Congratulations to my wife's grandmother, who turned 100 years old on Friday.  To celebrate, we drove up to Wisconsin on Saturday and spent the day with her, which left me unable to watch the Illini's 17-7 loss to Ohio State.   If anyone could figure out a way to lose a game in which the opponent completed only one pass in the entire game...well, it would have to be a team I root for, wouldn't it?  The Illini lost because the Buckeyes converted two turnovers into touchdowns, but the game wasn't sealed until a classic Ron Zook blunder in the final minutes.  With just over a minute left, the Illini had the ball and two time outs left, but faced 4th and 2 at the Ohio State 17 yard line.  But instead of kicking the field goal, the Illini went for the first down and failed, after which the Buckeyes ran out the clock.  Since you needed to score twice to win, why not kick the field goal there and leave as much time as possible to get the touchdown if you can recover the onside kick?  In the same situation last year, Northern Illinois took the field goal and then tried the onside kick (which the Illini recovered) even though the Huskies faced a longer kick than Derek Dimke would have attempted on Saturday, but I guess Ron Zook wasn't paying attention that day.  I only mention it because Lovie Smith made the exact same blunder at the end of last Monday's game against the Lions, and it would be nice if one of the football teams I root for had a coach who understood clock management.

Since I was on the road on Saturday night driving back to Chicago, I also missed Game 6 of the ALCS.  Apparently, so did the Detroit Tigers - they lost to the Texas Rangers 15-5, allowing the Rangers to repeat as American League champions.  And to be honest, I'm a little pissed at the Tigers right now, because they were the last team that could have prevented a nightmare World Series scenario.  With the Tigers out of the picture, this year's World Series winner will either be a hated rival, or a former loser franchise from Texas getting their first championship before I see the Cubs get one.  Now, where have I seen that before?  Oh, right.

But thanks to the Bears' performance on Sunday night, my sports weekend wasn't a complete disaster.  After Monday night's miserable performance, a home game against the hapless Minnesota Vikings (a/k/a "The Houston Astros of the NFC North") was just what the Bears needed. Too bad the Bears can't play the Vikings every week - the 39-10 win brought the Bears back to .500, and now I realize I may have been a little harsh in my assessment of the rest of the Bears season last week.  Other than the game at Green Bay, and maybe the game at Philadelphia, there's not a game on the remainder of the schedule that looks like a sure loss.  And with the Lions finally looking mortal Sunday, and with several other NFC contenders (Atlanta, Philadelphia) looking less than imposing so far this year, maybe the playoffs aren't such a reach for the Bears.  Of course, if the Bears couldn't get past the Packers to reach the Super Bowl last year, it's not like they have a shot to do it this year.  But I'm looking at it this way:  Lovie Smith's contract runs through 2013, so no matter how bad the Bears get this year, we're stuck with him through at least 2012, because there's no way in hell the McCaskeys fire a coach with two years remaining on his contract, right?   So since there's no reason to hope the Bears lose this year so they get rid of Smith faster (because that won't happen), we might as well hope for the best, and even a one-and-done #6 seed appearance in the playoffs would be worth it.  And don't worry, Smith-haters - with most of the Bears' star players on the wrong side of 30, and without enough quality young players in the pipeline to replace them, the end will come soon enough.

First Place! Woo-Hoo!

On a day where the Bears outgained the Lions 463 yards to 168 and knocked the Lions starting QB out of the game just before halftime, they still needed a technicality to beat the Lions 19-14. Bears' fans should be thankful that Matt Forte was there to provide some very powerful deodorant (the same goes for referee Gene Steratore). Otherwise, with the next three games being at Dallas, home against Green Bay, and at the Giants, we'd almost certainly be looking at an 0-4 start (not that 1-3 is anything to write home about).

Of course, this game shouldn't have been close, considering the yardage edge and the fact that the Lions played prevent offense for the entire second half with Matthew Stafford out of the game. Then again, the four Bears turnovers didn't help, nor did the 100 yards in penalties. And don't get me started on the Bears' decision to use the same goal-line playbook that Joe Paterno used in the 1979 Sugar Bowl. Seriously, they hire Mike Martz because he's some sort of offensive supergenius, and that's what they come up with - four runs up the middle on five plays from the one-yard line?

The good news is that Dallas appears to have a coaching staff that's just as stupid as ours, which gives us some hope. Wait, whom am I kidding? The Cowboys will probably be p***ed off about losing and take out their frustrations on the Bears. Whatever - I'm still going to enjoy looking down the standings at the Vikings while I can.

Second Place, Here We Come!

If the reports and rumors floating around are correct, congratulations to the Green Bay Packers, the 2010 NFC North champions. And congratulations to the Chicago Bears, too - that 7 or 8 win season now might be good enough for second place in the division! Heady times, indeed.

As a requiem for Brett Fav-ruh, if he truly stays retired, here are three facts:

1. His last pass as a Green Bay Packer was an interception which led to his team losing the NFC Championship game.

2. His last pass as a Minnesota Viking was an interception which led to his team losing the NFC Championship game.

3. Chris Chandler has quarterbacked a team to the Super Bowl more recently than Brett Fav-ruh has.